Evil has a name, time, and place

Today I introduced evil into my life.  It has a name, a physical place, and time that I will see it each and every day, and I can only blame myself.  Or wine.  I could blame wine since wine was involved when I let Brenna & Kathleen talk me into this evil. 

Okay, that’s a lie.  Well, not the wine part.  That’s 100% true. Saying that Brenna and Kathleen talked me into the evil, that’s a lie.  They mentioned it in passing, I heard them, and I interrupted.  “That sounds like fun.  I’m in.”

Dumb.  Because I’m one of those “principled” people where if I say I’m going to do it, even if I agree to it in an apparent drunken state of mind, I do it to the best of my ability.  I have always wanted to say that people can trust my word, which means that I have to follow thru. 

And I agreed to take part in this evil.  

A 5:00 AM Kickboxing Boot Camp.  6 days a week for 10 weeks straight.  With a nutrition plan. 

Why?  Why would I agree to something that in a mere 3 segment description contains so many things I loathe?!

If you asked me two weeks ago about the things I hate the most, I would have said this:

• Waking up before 7:30 in the morning (let’s be honest, anything before 9 a.m. has always been a struggle for me but 7:30 is the acceptable time for me to get my butt to work on time)
• Sweating and working out.  I don’t work out.  I play team sports and walk my dogs several miles a day.  That’s enough in my book.
• A nutrition plan that takes away my morning Mt. Dew(s – on super stressful days), alcohol, and forces me to eat a diet rich in protein and carbs – even when I’m not hungry.  I hate carbs – outside of fruit…and sugar. 

Even more confusing to signing up for such torture – unlike most who want this jump start, I’m pretty comfortable in my own skin.  I’m not in super great shape and could probably always use a little toning (thank you morning Mt. Dew), but I lead an active lifestyle.  My doctor tells me that all my “stats” are right on track, with only a concern that I have really low blood pressure and low cholesterol (both are almost too low).  I am a size 6 which is the exact same size I was high school.  In fact, I have only gone up or down about 5 lbs. since high school AND I have a pair of black capri’s that I still wear on a regular basis that I bought when I was 17.  I am not doing this to lose weight.

So what would possess me that this would be a good idea?  Other than the wine…

I hate to say it, because I really don’t think that I’m going to freak out or anything when the day comes, but the idea of my 30^th birthday being 6 months away played a big part in this decision.  Which I broke down into smaller factors/lifestyle choices that I feel I probably should make now before my 20-some-year-old habits in a 30 year old body catch up to me and I can’t fit into those black Capri’s. 

I love the idea of being in the best shape of my life at the oldest point of my life thus far.

I love the idea of having a workout routine.  Routines are big for me.  Once I get into them, I don’t deter much.  My problem has always been that I never have been able to motivate myself to workout by myself – it’s too taxing and I like to spend my free time thinking.  How can you think when you have to be mentally telling yourself “Just a little bit further… one more mile…you can do it….”?  Willing myself to cover ground or lift weights is not relaxing for me like it is for others.  Again, I’m a team sport kind of girl.  I played softball and volleyball in high school.  I didn’t do any individual sports.  If I have someone I may disappoint if I don’t give my all, I will do what I can to give my all.  If it was me on my own… I wouldn’t have gotten out of bed this morning.  Tackling this challenge with two close girlfriends, I won’t let them down.  And my hope is that after 10 weeks, a routine will be set and I will just keep going.  (More likely to happen if Brenna and Kathleen do this too).

I love the idea of being a morning person.  It doesn’t come naturally to me.  The rest of my family is so I’m not sure how I missed out on that gene.  I feel like morning people get more done and are more active.  I love sunrises.  I get to see a few every year for work, but I like the idea of seeing more of them. 

I love the idea of kicking the shit out of a 250 lb. bag as a way to get pent up feelings out of my body.  I do a very bad job of internalizing stress and I think this could be a great way to have a physical outlet for any stresses or frustrations that are building. 

I love the idea of a more balanced diet and planning menus ahead.  I will be honest, eating small snacks with smaller meals six times a day isn’t that far from what I do already.  But I don’t have a lot of variety in my diet and I don’t eat a lot of carbs, outside of sugar filled soda.  Which I know is bad for me, but it’s my one bad habit…. I found myself wanting to bargain with the instructor this morning (50 more reps for one Mt. Dew, PLEASE).  Although this hasn’t caught up with me yet, I know that some day it could. 

I love all these ideas.  I have always loved all these ideas, and have admired people who either came by these things naturally, or more impressively, have made the change.  So now, I’m challenging myself to make the change.  I really am happy about it and am excited to be making these changes.  I am confident that I will conquer evil.

Even though I’m excited, I felt the need to write this blog on Day 1 of boot camp as a warning.  None of the above ideas I love/lifestyle changes come naturally for me.  Every component of boot camp, other than ideas that I love to think about, I hate.  Not to mention the physical pain that I am in right now (I can barely lift my arms over my head).  Which is why I am using such strong language as evil and loathe in my description.

It is also why I feel that I need apologize ahead of time if I’m a bitch until I catch up to this evil routine.  

I would maybe avoid me until at least week 5.  Starting now.

For Real... A Prank... Or just a Stalker?

First - I doubt that there is anything I can write about that will top last week's blog as far as hits & controversy.  It’s all downhill from here kids….But I do think that I have stumbled upon a somewhat hilarious topic to blog about this week to try to retain a portion of you that contributed to the 1,500 hits (and counting) that I received last week.

Meet my friend Christine. 

I snapped this picture at our girls night after she shared the below story AND gave me permission to blog about it.

A little bit about Christine before we get into the story.  I joke that she’s the most interesting person I know, but I really feel that way.  Sorry to everyone else out there.  Read on and you’ll understand why.

What makes Christine so interesting?

• She’s a bad ass snowboarder that can outrun and out jump most of the guys that we ride with
• In high school she played Left & Right Wing on the MEN”S varsity hockey squad
• Post college she took an internship in South Africa where she tagged Great White Sharks (we’re talking shark week style kids!)
• Following the internship, she moved to Miami where she trained dolphins
• Next fall she’s leaving us to go back to Oregon State for Vet School (which is not an easy accomplishment)
• With her summer off in between she has decided that she wants to go to Alaska, possibly ride Ragbri, and do a road trip along the West Coast… pretty much by herself, possibly with some friends along the way.

This girl is fearless.  I can also state for a fact that she is one of the sweetest, kindest individual I’ve met.  She’s a great friend, beautiful from the inside out.

She also happens to be single.

As one of the only girls in our group who is unattached, and – mind you – not looking for anything serious since she is up and leaving for grad school in a matter of months, we delight in her stories of dating mishaps.  It’s a bit different when the girl isn’t searching for that deep meaningful connection.  These guys aren’t going to stick around, so like Christine, we don’t get attached and don’t feel bad when the date doesn’t turn out as planned.  It feels good to selfishly laugh at their seemingly rookie mistakes and not offend, because the girl wanted the guy to be more than he was .

But this guy…. Oh man, he needs an intervention….

I wasn’t there, but Christine set the stage very well.  Let me share.

Christine and 2 of our other girlfriends went out last Friday night.  At 1 a.m. they stumbled into a bar in Old Town called Lucky Joe’s.  At 1:30, a guy sat himself down next to Christine.  His opening line: “You are the most beautiful girl I have ever seen.”

This, of course, gets her attention to a certain degree.  She tells him her name in Christine.  He calls her Kristy.  She corrects him.  “Can’t I just call you Kristy?” he asks.  She tells him no. “I’m just going to call you Kristy,” he responds.

She continues to talk to him until bar close.  She is somewhat interested, even if a little annoyed by the name thing, so she gives him her cell number.  They part ways.  Her next contact with him is a text message.

At 5 a.m. that morning….

(Oh- and if you really want to get the best laugh about what comes next, I suggest that you quickly surround yourself with your closest friends, drink a few glasses of wine, and read the following messages out loud.  TRUST ME)

“Ok I really like you Kristy, this is Scott. And I really want to date you, not just kinda. I want to love you too, and you can leave me whenever, orrrr want to try to do this instead!!!!!?! Tomorrow, or we can talk on it for awhile, why try soooo hard though when we could just do it for us, like a boss!!!...Here we go, I can feel something good inside of you, and I felt it big time earlier tonight, it was meant to be!! and I am not trying to convince you.  I am saying you are the shit, and you f*(ing rock, and you are cool to me! So cool, for real Kristy! I have never told a women that, and you can show your friends this text if you want to yoooo!"

(side point – I think she would have showed up the texts even if he didn’t give her permission to;)

“ you are everything I see in myself, like a friend I am no better and I can love you fully, although Kristy I mean that! I felt it fully tonight, like not too much, just a lot.  Haha and I don’t want it to be weird for you, that’s true… for it to be nothing tho and us to be just friends would suck nutz! Lol, when we could just rock at it together lol and that is funny haha!!! Ok, we could be great together if we tried it, did it, And you know it!!! You are a gret person and I am very attracted to you, like sooo much to everything about you, and why is that bad?  I want to doooo it, ha fo youu? Because I want to be yours and I want to try everything with you instead of just letting everything go, forever with you is better, I want to then its perfect we only met you knowwww,? Alright, don’t just real me off on this statement lol and I know you can see it, I know you know it, what do you think? Somethingggg good, sexy, fun, tell me anything? Got any ideas??????? Ha ok honestly do you like it when I say it out, I  Love you? Scott from the bar hahaha!"

I really am not doing it justice as a text.  This message was so long that it came in as 14 separate texts.  He follows this gigantic text with the following, minutes later.

“What is your last name if you don’t mind Me asking, and yes I am Not..a super huge giant creep, I swear it!! Lol have a good day tomorrow, and I love you a ton!”

Obviously Christine doesn’t answer.

Saturday night, he writes again.

At 8 p.m.:

“Yo Yo!”

At 9 p.m.:

“…and have a good night!!”

At Midnight:

“yooooo wtf are you doing Kristy!?  I just got done with work!! 12 hours of shitt since 10 this morning, lets get krunkkd ha please?! Saturday night f*(  yeah I livelive downtown so I am dowm foooo whatever!!”

At 12:30 a.m.:

“So shit! I don’t care get me drunk with me break my heart and sdnd me home alone even like idk do you smoke trees? I got some shtuff we can smoke bar hop it, I don’t have a lot of money tho I got enough to buy you a beer, hit me up baby I want to!!!!”

Ah, the picture starts to become a little bit clearer with that last text….

Christine was working an overnight at the vet clinic that she works at.  She didn’t get any of Saturday’s messages until 7 a.m. on Sunday morning.

But it doesn’t stop there.  Sunday morning….

At 9 a.m.:

“You know courage comes from bravery.  I went backpacking through Peru in 2009, that is South America! I think the bolder experiences in our lives that we chose define, did you know that we are like the 5 most people in ourlives? Meaning: there is a reason why people have the characteristics we see in ourselves, haha!”

Followed by my personal favorite, at 9:45 a.m.:

“Do you like country music?”

And finally, at 10 a.m., Scott from the bars last ditch effort to pull “Kristy” into his world:

“I have so many things I wan to do with my one and only life, how about you? I want to travel and play music… I want to build a house in the mountains one day when I am wealthy haha… I haven’t been home in so long, I have learned to findout that home is where the heart is, maybe that you see that in me?”

And that is the last that we’ve heard from Scott at the bar.  All that, heart and soul poured out partially thru liquid and smoked courage I’m sure, without a single response from his beloved “Kristy”.  Sigh… I’m thinking that someone needs to explain to Scott from the bar that my Rule of 3 does not mean 3 days filled with as much contact as possible.  I’m sure his heart is breaking.

Now, I will admit that back in the day, I would mis-use my phone when in a drunken state and drunk dial or text ridiculous things to my friends or boyfriend.  Or – would forget to hang up my phone after I was done talking…. (anyone who knows THAT story should be laughing right now)   Really, I think that any of us who have been in college during the age of cell phones can admit that drunk dials and texts are just an embarrassment that you learn to live with.  But the above really takes the cake….

Which has led a few of those who have seen the messages to wonder if this guy was really sending all of those messages on purpose… or maybe his asshole buddy just got a hold of his phone and was trying to sabotage his friend for who knows what reason…

The messages are so cringe worthy that it is hard to believe that Scott from the bar could be so clueless on his drunk texting… or even that drunk…. to think that any of that was a good idea.

So I’m throwing it out there – what do you think?

Is Scott from the bar:

• That clueless?
• That drunk/stoned?
• A prankster – or his buddy is?
• Or just a plain old fashioned stalker and we should suggest that Christine gets a new phone number and never step foot in Lucky Joe’s again.

(I’m going to suggest that anyway).

All In & Proud (to be One)

Oh Facebook.  How you create drama out of nothing. 

We’ve all had it happen – or at least seen it happen.  3 to 4 people that don’t know each other start a “discussion” (aka argument) under a mutual friend’s status update.  What is the mutual friend to do… other than consider and blog;)

This recently happened on my wall.  I posted a note about the ISU/Mizzou men’s basketball game prior to last Wednesday’s game.  12 comments later, I was looking at a “discussion” between my husband, a high school friend, and an old co-worker.  All, including myself, were taking jabs at the old co-worker for posting his opinion once I identified that he was an UNI grad but a self proclaimed Hawkeye “fan”.

This, my friends, is my biggest issue with college ““fans”.

I am not a Cyclone fan.  I am a Cyclone. 

Is there a difference? In my opinion - yes.  And I think that many would agree with me.  Especially when viewed as such:

• A “fan” is a person who supports a team or a college out of interest in the programs.
• Being a Cyclone, that's a person who lived the Iowa State experience. 

Being a “fan” shouldn’t be convenient or based off a winning percentage.  It should be tried & true love – which is why there is a difference between being a “fan” & being a (insert school’s mascot here).  As a __________, you are tied to that university.  You can’t jump ship ever; it helps that you have the school loans to prove it.

In fact, there are rules to how you MUST cheer for your team.

ESPN's Page 2: Rules for College Fandom *

In the hierarchy of collegiate athletic love, a “fan” is automatically less reputable.  Sure they may be able to quote back player stats, or may attend every single home game and buy the overpriced cable package to get every single away game.  But unless you forced yourself out of bed on a Friday morning to run to an 8 a.m. 100 level psychology/geology/history class hung over because you have a test on that campus, you loose a lot of street cred in my opinion.

I respect anyone out there that shares a fierce love for their college.  You should be proud to say that you are a (fill in the mascot) because you should be proud of your experience.  I will cheer on your team if you cheer on mine.  Cheering doesn’t mean that I’ve switched over.  Let’s be honest – I struggle to justify to myself wearing a CSU shirt when we attend football games in Fort Collins because I didn’t go to CSU.  To me, it feels a little bit like I’m cheating on Iowa State if I don the green and gold… 

I also don’t want to completely disregard “fans”.  They fill stadium seats and bars.  They cheer just as loud.  They feel pride in the teams and purchase hats, shirts, and jerseys.  “Fans” pump a lot of money into athletic programs.  My main point is – if you are just a “fan”, you missed out.  The only thing that you can relate to with these athletes is what you see on the field, court, or track.  And college athletes experience much more during their tenure on campus.  Including forcing themselves out of bed to run to a morning workout and then attend that horrid 8 a.m. 100 level filler class only to sit next to those hung over students that may smell because the sweatshirt they pulled on hasn’t been washed for weeks. 

You may say this makes no sense to you.  If that is the first thing that comes to your mind, you may be just a “fan”.  I’m trying very hard to avoid the word bandwagon.  And I want you to think of it this way…

I've come to realize that describing the feeling of a person's college experience similar to knowing the feeling of being from a small town.  It's a way of life that thrives, something that only people who live there and grow up within its arms are able to recognize the comforting feel of its routines and interactions. 

Think of where you were raised, the familiar faces and traditions.  The annual festivals, the high school team rivalries, the places snuck off to with friends.  The teachers, bridge club, coaches, first bosses, Sunday school teachers, and friend's parents who acted as guides to adulthood.  Would a friend who grew up in New York understand the feelings that those memories, places, and people evoke?  Even if you tried your hardest to explain it to them?

I wouldn't expect anyone who wasn't from Coggon or Walker or Troy Mills to know what it was really like to be a North Linn Lynx.  But everyone who is knows how happy everyone was when the girls cross country team FINALLY won the state meet, knows the difference between the colors burgundy and maroon, has heard the Mole song and is a little bit sad to hear that Mr. Arns is finally retiring this year.  When I admit that I was the one that broke Jambi, all the speech geeks cringe.  And everyone who went to North Linn that is reading this post is smiling right now.

Those unique attributes that are intertwined into the past, present, and future - that's what creates the biggest buzz word in the business world today.  Culture.  Businesses strive to find that "special" something that connects people, that makes people smile.  Culture is something that carries people the hard times and makes people laugh most of the time.  It drives people to be involved.  It's hard to create; often it just happens when the right people are in the right place at the right time.  Or when others remember it as the right people in the right place at the right time.  It is, simply, the experience.

As a high school graduate from a class of 40, thinking of Iowa State feels the same - it makes me smile.  It was a small town culture, only amplified to an annual student body of 30,000.  Because of this I am more apt to run into fellow Cyclones than someone who has stepped foot in Coggon.  And with the shared culture, I can always find something to relate with them regardless of age or the year they graduated.  We share in a camaraderie wrapped in cardinal and gold. 

If say that I had to walk from Willow to Design three days a week for spring semester, I can be asked why the hell I didn't take Cyride.  Mention of mass campaniling may bring a blush to someone's cheeks.  I don't have to explain what VEISHEA stands for.  The name Jack Trice means something when thrown into conversation, as does the statement "Honor before Victory".  All will agree that Saturdays were meant for tailgating.  You know how to properly announce the Iowa State Varsity Marching Band.  The satire site title "Wide Right and Natty Light" is hilarious.  We all know who The Mayor is and have felt Hilton Magic.  True Iowa Staters talk about what show they saw- or missed- at the M-shop.  Let’s talk about being chased by those damn swans.  Or the crows.  Laying out on central campus.  Avoiding the zodiac at all costs.  We could have a long discussion of what bar replaced The Dean's List, or The Library, or Sips.  While we're at it, lets raise your mug filled with an FAC special and say a little prayer in memory of People's and Lumpy's.  Thank goodness Welch Ave is still hanging in there.

This list can go on and on, but I promised that this post was not ONLY about being a Cyclone. 

For me, I've had both experiences, growing up in a small town and having a strong connection to the following phase of my life, being a student at Iowa State.  Both cultivated important building blocks, something that I’m sure that collegiate athletes feel just as strongly, if not more.

A sense of community.  A sense of belonging.  These two things create loyalty.

It's why the ISU Athletic Marketing Department's phrase "All In" makes perfect sense to me. I didn't need to buy into it, I was already there.

I can share the above details and memories with anyone I meet.  I can try to explain and share my stories of growing up, both in a small town and at Iowa State.  But unless you were there in those buildings at some point in time sharing those every day simple traditions, you really don't know what it was like and can only partially feel those connections.  I will maintain my opinion that you can only be a “fan”.




*This post is my response to 1(e). I do, however, agree with almost every other sub rule of 1.

**You may also see rule 4 and think “Well, this guy went to UNI.  Shouldn’t he be able to pick a bigger school?”  My answer to this is no – UNI is a great school with great athletic teams.  They have had a competitive football, basketball and a kick ass volleyball program for years.  The tailgating scene may not be so hot, but unless the student body supports these programs by putting butts in seats, it never will.  Which is why its no excuse to switch out of your purple and gold for other colors.  Unless you’re a “fan”.